Advice for Eloping with Your Kids in 2022
There’s no reason why you can’t have the elopement that you’ve always dreamed of while including your kids! In fact, it can make your wedding day truly special to involve your kiddos into different aspects of the day from getting ready to the celebration.
Photo by Elizabeth Le Photography
Can you elope if you have kids?
Of course you can! While we always encourage our couples to elope exactly how they want and plan the day they’ve always envisioned, we’re often asked how couples can include their children in this special day. Above all, remember that this is your wedding day and that there are no rules, restrictions, or limitations. Have the day you want! If that means bring your kiddos along, the more the merrier!
Photo by Kristen Joy Photography
9 Ways to Include Your Kids in Your Elopement
It’s important to note that every couple is different, and every child is different, too. Be sure to individualize the involvement to what will work for your child, their age, their interests, and what feels right for you as a couple on your special day. We’ve worked with couples that have included their children in almost every step of the process and some that focus on one special moment for them to shine. Here’s a few fun ways to celebrate with your kids before, during and after your elopement ceremony.
1. Get Ready Together
Whether you’re planning to include your kid in the ceremony or not, you can still get ready together! We’ve had a few couples do this and it makes for some of the sweetest pre-ceremony moments, plus it’s always nice to have a buddy while getting all dolled up. Have them help you get into your shoes, straighten your tie or even put on your jewelry so they feel like they’re truly helping you get ready.
Photo by The Emerics
2. Have Them Sign Your Marriage License
In some states you are able to self-solemnize, which means that you can marry yourselves without an officiant or witness. In this case, most couples sign their marriage license as their own officiants, but this could be a great opportunity for your kiddo to have a special job. Let them sign as your witness! It will be such a fun thing to show them when they’re older if they’re too young to remember at the time of your elopement.
3. Include Them in Your Wedding Party
Who doesn’t love an adorable ring bearer, flower girl, bridesmaid or best little man?! This is always a cute idea and most of the time, the kids love to have the spotlight for a few minutes. If you would rather not have a wedding party, then you can include your children in the ring exchange, unity ritual or other aspects of your ceremony that can require an extra hand.
Photo by Kristen Joy Photography
4. FaceTime or Video Chat With Your Kiddos
If you aren’t planning on including your kid in the actual ceremony, then bring them up on FaceTime or a video chat so that they can be there virtually. They’ll be able to watch your vows from wherever they are and see you all dressed up on one of the most important days of your life.
5. Family First Looks
Just like when two partners have their first look, plan one with your kids! It usually ends up being an adorable moment that makes for the cutest photos. You can plan a first look with your kiddos before or after one with your partner. Or you can plan for a family first look where everyone is together! The choice is really up to you for what makes the most sense for your family.
Photo by Jamie Y
6. Give Them a Special Gift
Gift your little one something special that they can keep forever — maybe even something they’ll use on their wedding day! Some ideas are a piece of jewelry, lapel pin, cufflinks, or even a photograph of a special moment for them to hold on to for the years to come.
7. Let Them Walk You Down the Aisle
One of our favorite ways to incorporate your kids, and a total tear-jerker! Don’t forget to have some fun practicing together before the big day.
Photo by The Emerics
8. Give Them the Mic
If you want your kid to feel like they’re truly a part of the ceremony, you can always set aside some time or specific readings for them to recite. Another idea is give them the chance to make a short speech about their thoughts surrounding your marriage and how excited they are for your family’s new beginning.
9. Have Your Child Pronounce You Married
Rather than your officiant pronouncing you married, let your kids do the honor! Whether your kids can speak or not, it’s so special to let them be the first to acknowledge that you’re now a married couple. Trust us, you’re going to want someone to video it for you!
Photo by Kristen Joy Photography
3 Helpful Tips for Eloping With Kids
Like anything else, having your kids at your elopement doesn’t mean that everything will always go according to plan. As you know, kids can get cranky, hungry or bored at any moment and may require some additional attention — and that’s OK! Here’s a few important things to remember for any parents who want to elope with kids present.
Photo by Elizabeth Le Photography
1. Be Patient and Realistic
You know your child better than anyone, so you’ll know what’s going to work best for their age and personality. If you and your partner are planning an adventure elopement then you may want to reconsider if you’re budgeting for hiking or a ceremony in a potentially hazardous location. If you’re planning a desert elopement, your child may be sensitive to the heat and want to go inside. Regardless of what your elopement looks like, remember to be patient and realistic with your plans when it comes to including any children.
2. Have a Backup Plan Ready
If it’s going to be a long day, it never hurts to have a back-up plan ready for your kids. The reality is that they can get tired or need a break much more often than adults do, so be sure to plan for it! Have snacks, drinks, portable fans and more handy in case they need to recharge. We’re here to help you build out a schedule that makes the most sense for your family and is easy on everyone! If you have any questions about how to arrange the day’s events, be sure to chat with us.
3. A Kiddo Wrangler is a Smart Move
Even if your child is well-behaved 99 percent of the time, it never hurts to have a friend or family member available as your designated kiddo wrangler. Little ones can require a lot of attention, and we still want you to be able to enjoy your elopement! For those couples that are planning an adventure elopement, a kiddo wrangler can be extremely important to keep them away from dangerous areas and make sure they aren’t getting into any trouble. That way, you’ll be able to focus on your partner during the ceremony without a worry!
Photo by The Emerics
How do you tell your kids you’ve eloped?
The best way to tell them is to just tell them! Be honest and open in your communication so that they understand all of the moving parts and don’t think they weren’t important in the process. Most couples put serious thought into their communication plan with their kids, so make sure that your children know just how important it is that the do of you are eloping and how much you love each other (and them!).
